Ropery Hall News

Hal Cruttenden: Can Dish It Out But Can’t Take It

Hal is back with a brand-new tour for 2025/2026 with a show that promises to stick it to ‘The Man’, as long as ‘The Man’ doesn’t stick it back to him.

With his trademark hard-hitting ‘take no prisoners’ comedy (this is what Hal told me to write!!!) he will be hilariously pontificating on subjects like middle aged dating, social media, the insanity of modern politics and the fact that his daughters love him but don’t respect him. He believes that, after you’ve seen the show, you’ll feel exactly the same way.

His last tour was extended four times and he’s one of a select number of comics to have done Live At The Apollo three times and the Royal Variety twice, TV also includes Have I Got News For You, The Apprentice You’re Fired, Bake Off Extra Slice and Would I Lie To You.

‘Reminded me of how much I love stand up‘ ★★★★ The Times

 ‘Go and see Hal Cruttenden, he’s got something to say and he’ll make you laugh; a lot.’ ★★★★★ Daily Mirror

 ‘Naturally funny…challenging and provocative’ ★★★★ Daily Telegraph

How Lovely

Daniel was determined to handle his Big Breakup with the grace of Julia Roberts. He didn’t. Join him as he navigates dating in your 30s, Le Creuset addiction and 12-step skincare routines, all while trying very hard to emanate love and light.

Described by Rolling Stone as ‘utterly hilarious and effortlessly charismatic’, award-winning stand-up Daniel is best known for his viral comedy videos, which are enjoyed by millions of women and gays online. 

His critically-acclaimed debut show Villain toured internationally, including a sell-out run at New York’s SoHo Playhouse and London’s legendary Clapham Grand. He co-hosts the podcast Welcome To Hell with fellow comic Dane Buckley, which debuted in Apple and Spotify’s Top 10 comedy charts, and he is the author of the hit book Bedtime Stories for Privileged Children. 

‘Utterly hilarious and effortlessly charismatic’ ★★★★★ Rolling Stone

‘Relentlessly hilarious’ ★★★★★ Broadway World

‘A supremely gifted comic’ ★★★★★ North West End UK

★★★★ The Scotsman

★★★★ The List

Daliso Chaponda has been writing jokes about the news for over a decade – on Have I Got News For You, Radio 4′ News Quiz, Australia’s Good News Week and many more besides. (In fact he’s seen the news from both sides, having been in the tabloids himself.) But recently the news has been so absurd, chaotic and overwhelming that it more or less mocks itself. Where do we go from here?

Topical Storm is Daliso’s response. A show not about THE news but about news itself. Journalists, bloggers, fake news, satirical news: have we lost the thread of it all? Is the reporting of news endlessly polarising us as a society rather than educating us? Would we be better off going right back to the first ever news bulletin – the original caveman drawing on a wall – and starting from scratch? Daliso does just that in this explosive new standup show.

Age guidance: 14+ *Minority Ethnic Group concession

One family, one condition, one hell of a hairy baby…  Scott Bennett from Live at the Apollo, The Royal Variety Performance and The News Quiz tells the amazing true story of how his daughter fell ill with a rare genetic condition, congenital hyperinsulinism (CHI). Never heard of it?  Neither had Scott and Jemma.

‘What’s so rare and satisfying is how all the jokes go hand in hand with the seriousness of the situation. It’s a wonderfully hopeful, often hilarious show from a properly funny man’ The Times ★★★★

‘Fabulous turn of phrase, superb character creations ‘ Chortle ★★★★

‘Stardom is surely just one punchline away ‘ Evening Standard ★★★★

Yes, it’s a story about an ill baby, but it’s a very funny one with a happy ending, as new parents Scott and Jemma fight to get the right diagnosis for their daughter and are plunged into months of bewildering treatment, sleepless nights, celebrity encounters and bizarre side effects.

“Beautifully written and funny in all the right places. Brilliant” Jim Hansen

“A real rollercoaster of emotions, but absolutely brilliant” Jennifer Brady

“One of the best shows we’ve ever seen, an amazing show, laughter and tears, it was just brilliant” Lee Gray 

“Genuinely hilarious and heartwarming, reminding us of the power of being able to make light of bad situations” George Couch

“So relatable and emotional for us as fellow blood sugar parents, for anyone who hasn’t seen it, I 100% recommend it!” The CHI Charity

“An amazing mix of comedy and Drama” Daniel Smith

“An engaging, heartfelt and emotional journey, turned into a comedy masterclass” Mike Pierrepoint

“What an amazing story and unique way of telling it, belly laughs and a tear at the end” Phil Phillips

Ian Smith: Foot Spa Half Empty 

Edinburgh Comedy Award nominee Ian Smith (co-host of the Northern News podcast) heads back out on tour with a new show about stress, love and buying a magic spell off Amazon.

As seen on Live at the Apollo, Have I Got News For You and The Stand Up Sketch Show – and heard on The News Quiz, The Unbelievable Truth, Just A Minute and his own Radio 4 series, Ian Smith is Stressed. 

His last show Crushing was also shortlisted for the (ISH) Edinburgh Comedy Award, runner-up in Next Up’s “Biggest Award in Comedy” and nominated for a Chortle Award for Best Show. It was one of the Guardian’s Top 10 Comedy Shows of 2023 and featured on the British Comedy Guide’s Best Reviewed Shows of 2023.

“Effortlessly brilliant” ★★★★ Scotsman

“There are few fringe shows as purely funny as this” ★★★★ Guardian

 “An outstanding and stressed-out hour of stand-up” ★★★★ Fest

“The hilarity just keeps coming… he has excelled himself” ★★★★ Beyond the Joke

“Ian Smith turns incredulity into an art form, confirming his status as the undisputed sultan of nerve-shredding stress” Rolling Stone

Age guidelines: 16+ 

Join us for a wonderful night of comedy with our regular Barnstormers compere and three comedians from the national circuit.